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色付いた花が咲く何時かを願う
その痛み知る君が震えずに水を注げた頃に
見た事の無い色の花がまた君を誘う
redberrie
19 +
04-06-1991
NP - BA - ISCM - 3S01
ex-assumptionknight
<33! |
Friday, May 26, 2006
: 10:11:00 PM :
im paronoid. berry. i suppose that word means ultra sensitive. anyway, im feeling sensitive. kind of fedup with everything. i do this, you said okay. when i come back to report back to you, you started saying that you have never told to do so. whatever mann. some more, you were the one who said anything . all i want to do is just to be myself. is it that hard? yes. im scared. who wouldnt? when you cant even see your own fingers. and you start to realise that you're not here. not there. then you think.. where are you. seriously. i dun care. i want to heck care. im just going to do what i lyk. for once.
i dont know. i dont know anything. i just dont know.
27.5.2006 10.49 pm
愛憎の狭間 夢を見ていた
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Monday, May 22, 2006
: 11:19:00 PM :
okay. let's try to calm down. not burst into tears and having sudden tantrums and mood-swings. shall calm down, chill and STOP being so hard on yourself. stop feeling lyk a pile of shit either. its all not going to help. ermm, and she carn help you too heh. as proven, but nvm. breathes in and out* i need to CHILL. COOL DOWN. and be CALM, please. for god's sake. SETTLE DOWN. dunno how to do then just anyhow do. try. at least better than handing in nothing. okay. feeling better? yes, i suppose so. whatever. just continue do bahh. im sure you'd want you to jiayou. yeahh mann. cheers. =]
what is everyone's bloody problem. your group mate carn info. so will it kill you to just help. great. then why dun everyone just quit. bloody hell. this is so irritating and pointless. im really getting frustrated. this justs sucks. stoopid idiots. fine, then lets all heck care. since it's so fun to do it. i dun want to care. so im going to heck care too.
愛憎の狭間 夢を見ていた
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Monday, May 15, 2006
: 5:28:00 PM :
KINDNESS Pays!
One day, a poor boy who was selling goods from door to door to pay his way through
school, found he had only one thin dime left, and he was hungry. He decided he would ask for a meal at the next house. However, he lost his nerve when a lovely young woman opened the door. Instead of a meal he asked for a drink of water. She thought he looked hungry so brought him a large glass of milk. He drank it slowly, and then asked, "How much do I owe you?"
"You don't owe me anything," she replied "Mother has taught us never to accept payment for a kindness." He said... "Then I thank you from my heart." As Howard Kelly left that house, he not only felt stronger physically, but his faith in God and man was strong also. He had been ready to give up and quit.
Years later that young woman became critically ill. The local doctors were baffled. They finally sent her to the big city, where they called in specialists to study her rare disease. Dr. Howard Kelly was called in for the consultation. When he heard the name of the town she came from, a strange light filled his eyes.
Immediately he rose and went down the hall of the hospital to her room. Dressed in his doctor's gown he went in to see her. He recognized her at once. He went back to the consultation room determined to do his best to save her life. From that day he gave special attention to the case.
After a long struggle, the battle was won. Dr. Kelly requested the business office to pass the final bill to him for approval. He looked at it, then wrote something on the edge and the bill was sent to her room. She feared to open it, for she was sure it would take the rest of her life to pay for it all.
Finally, she looked, and something caught her attention on the side as she read these words.....
"Paid in full with one glass of milk."
(Signed) Dr. Howard Kelly.
Tears of joy flooded her eyes as her happy heart prayed: "Thank You, GOD, that your love has spread abroad through human hearts and hands."
愛憎の狭間 夢を見ていた
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Sunday, May 14, 2006
: 2:32:00 AM :
sighs. hey ppl. on another of my late night sprees AGAIN. apparently i seem to love them. haha. tong xiao on thursday nite. friday go school for art with exam question paper and incompleted art work. hahaa. cant help it. im dead le. seriously deserve it. ive never seen a more screwed papers than these. haha, maybe other than nanyang's one. poof. oh btw, we found a dead crow in our class that morning too. everyone present kinda screamed their heads off. haaha. act one lahh. so entertaining. ppl were busy making up crazy predictions. a berry good example is that everyone in our class will flunk art cause everyone's doing last minute work. haha.
im feeling alot. been lyk a emotion bomb lately. im feeling. and i can feel so much. i have alot of questions. tons. millions. and zillions. im angry. angry as in i dun understand why. and why i carn just sit down and plonk the book on the table and start digesting lyk madd. why why why. oh and can you please at least just let me see you come online. its killing me heh. sighs. -pats-. some times, i have to remind myself that you not a fairy or something. you're a normal human being lyk me. but more perfect and this crazy thing call self-discipline, which i severely lack. but star-shaped fishball and charcoal seems to have lots and lots. poof.
can hear a new japanese anime song? yupps. i think its berry nice. haha. its from witch hunter robin, the opeining theme. a sophisticated literature kind of anime heh. and lots of cliffhagers. bahh. abit irritating sometimes. especially the last episode. anyway, the last episode is on arts central, the animania thingy. 11 o'clock. hmm, haha, actually if you din watch from the start, i doubt you'll understand anything. but i still think its really the best anime i've watched. i mean something more sensible and philosophical. =]
my shell just seems to be getting bigger and bigger.
and to the road of endless.
shell
Hitomi wo fuseruto sugukieteshimaisoude
Jibun ga mishiranu tanin ninattaki gasuru
Kanashiihodo chippokena
Sukuwaretaikara tameiki wo tsukuno janaku
Kakidashite shimatta kodoku no kehai no kazu wo Tada kazoeteita
It's like I'll disappear as soon as I close my eyes
I feel like I've turned into someone that even I don't recognize
Sadly, I've become so small
I want to be rescued, but instead of sighing
I vomited up my loneliness, and just lay there, measuring it all up
Kawaita jikan no nakade
Oboreterumogaiteru kokoro
Memaiga surukurai no uso wo
Uketomete hikisaita
Soshite watashi ga
mayoikomunowa
Usuyami no sekai
Amidst this drop of time gone dry
My heart is drowning and writhing
These lies that make me dizzy
I took them and tore them up
And with that,
I became lost
In a world of thin darkness. [1]
Shinjirubekimonono tamenitoeranda basho wa
Jiyuu wo kagi nishita ori no nakadeshou Kesshite mou Nukedasenai
Kawaita nodo no oku de
Hajimatta hakanasa no wake wa
Chikazuku ashita ga kowaikara
Uzukumari kuzuretemo
Watashi wo sagashite sasayakikakeru
Usuyami no koe
For the sake of those whom I should trust
I chose to come here, a cage into which I've locked myself, and now
there's no escape.
Deep inside my parched throat
Lies the reason for this growing impermanence [2]
Scared of the approaching tomorrow
I cower and collapse
But it seeks me out and whispers to me
This voice of thin darkness. [1]
Kawaita jikan no nakade
Oboreteru mogaiteru kokoro
Memaig asurukurai no uso wo
Uketomete hikisaita Soshite watashi ga
Mayoikomunowa
Usuyami no sekai
Amidst this drop of time gone dry
My heart is drowning and writhing
These lies that make me dizzy
I took them and tore them up
And with that, I became lost
In a world of thin darkness.
14 . 5 . 2006 2.46 pm
愛憎の狭間 夢を見ていた
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CREDITS |
-- HESITATING MEANS DEATH - the GazettE [Italian translation - angeldevil87@LJ]
[English translation - distressedcoma@LJ]
You, who know this pain, will soon plant the seeds here once again
You hope the flowers that changed their colours will bloom someday
You, who know this pain, could you pour water on them without trembling
The colourful flowers you have never seen are calling out for you again